I'm sure by now, everyone has heard of Friendster. If you haven't, I suggest you donate your PC to some charity and then sign a blood oath to never ever touch a computer again, because its painfully obvious you're a retard...
Now, Friendster started off really nicely. It was a place to get in touch with long lost friends, say a little bit about yourself, make new friends and also, quite possibly, find a mate for some bedroom gymnastics.
But now, Friendster has turned into quite possibly one of the most annoying websites around! Let me tell you why:
Stupid forwarded messages.
To those who keep forwarding messages, understand this;
1. Friendster is NOT closing.
2. Make A Wish will NOT donate 2 cents for every message forwarded about Baba Gadush in Durka-stan who needs a new set of testicles because his were blown off by the US Army.
3. Your gf/ mother/ cat/ toilet/ etc will NOT stop loving you if you don't forward this message.
So please, stop forwarding unnecessary messages on Friendster! People don't think you're nice/ cute/ friendly if you do that. People think you're a lame fucking asshole if you do!
Stupid polls.
Seriously, who gives a flying fuck about:
what you like or dislike
what you did today
who you hugged the last time
or whatever else lame shit about your life?! Seriously... NOBODY CARES! So please, stop posting that crap on the Bulletin board!
Personal details.
A "location" is where you are right now. A "Hometown" if where you're from. So simple to understand but yet, you see retards saying "Location = California, Hometown = England, Philippines, Norway, Singapore, etc"... How the hell could you have been born in multiple place?! For fuck's sakes, USE YOUR BRAINS!
Pictures (A).
Put your own picture in your profile! DO NOT put teddy bears, anime characters, movie stars and so forth! Nothing annoys me more than this! If you're ugly, you're ugly! Don't think by putting Aishwarya Rai's picture as your profile picture, something miraculous is going to happen to you. That mirror is still going to break when you look into it!
Pictures (B).
I don't know why but some people like to pose in extremely annoying ways for their Friendster photos. Examples are:
1. Making a V sign (also known as "Peace") and poking both fingers into their cheek.
2. Puffing out their cheeks and poking a finger into one cheek.
3. Making a "sad puppy" expression.
4. Making a "Please cum on my face" expression.
The whole finger-poking-face thing was made popular by Japanese GT Queens. Now, those women are hot! So, they have a passport of sorts to to whatever the hell they want! But you? No, you don't come close even to their toenails! So please, DO NOT do the GT Queen pose unless you ARE a GT Queen!
If you make the "Please cum on my face" pose in your photos, do not be surprised when people do actually ask you "Do you want me to cum on your face?"
Sending messages for the first time.
If you want to send a message to a person for the first time, try being creative! DO NOT send stupid shit like "Heyya! Can we be fwenzzz?" I and many other people DO NOT want retards who can't speak properly as our friends!
To the guys, do you seriously think sending a message like "Hey babe! I like your tits!" to a hot chick is going to get you some action?! USE YOUR FUCKING BRAINS!
Now, excuse me while I go delete some people from my friend list and some stupid forwarded messages...
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
And we told Man. Utd. not to come for this?!
AFC Asian Cup Group C:
China-5
Peng Han (15)
Jiayi Shao (36)
Dong Wang (51)
Peng Han (55)
Dong Wang (90)
Malaysia-1
Indra Putra Mahayuddin (72)
........................................................................................................................................
AFC Asian Cup Group C:
Final-National Stadium Bukit Jalil Attendance: 20,000
China-5
Peng Han (15)
Jiayi Shao (36)
Dong Wang (51)
Peng Han (55)
Dong Wang (90)
Malaysia-1
Indra Putra Mahayuddin (72)
........................................................................................................................................
AFC Asian Cup Group C:
Final-National Stadium Bukit Jalil Attendance: 5,000
Uzbekistan (5)
Maksim Shatskikh (10)
Timur Kapadze (29)
Ulughbek Bakaev (pen 45)
Aziz Ibragimov (85)
Maksim Shatskikh (89)
Malaysia (ZERO)
..........................................................................................................................................................................
Tigers of Asia? More like PUSSIES of Asia!
In a way, I guess its a good thing Man. Utd. didn't come here. If they had a match with these pussies, it wouldn't even be considered a warm-up!
Monday, July 16, 2007
Use the search button!
I love this... don't you?
what do we learn from this?
1. In almost EVERY webpage/ forum/ etc, there is something called and FAQ. It stands for Frequently Asked Questions. So, before asking stupid questions that have been answered a few billion times, READ THE FUCKING FAQ FIRST!
2. If a webpage has an FAQ, it will most likely have a "Search" function too. So, USE THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION BEFORE ASKING YOUR DUMB QUESTION!
3. In forums, when someone is selling/ advertising/ offering/ something, he/ she will put up a sales notice and then some descriptions. READ THE DESCRIPTIONS BEFORE ASKING QUESTIONS!
4. Sometimes, if an item is highly desirable, there will be many posts in the thread where it is being offered. However, the crucial information is still available on the first page. So please, CHECK THE FIRST PAGE BEFORE ASKING "DETAILS PLEASE."!
You'd think the pointers above were common knowledge right? Think again!
what do we learn from this?
1. In almost EVERY webpage/ forum/ etc, there is something called and FAQ. It stands for Frequently Asked Questions. So, before asking stupid questions that have been answered a few billion times, READ THE FUCKING FAQ FIRST!
2. If a webpage has an FAQ, it will most likely have a "Search" function too. So, USE THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION BEFORE ASKING YOUR DUMB QUESTION!
3. In forums, when someone is selling/ advertising/ offering/ something, he/ she will put up a sales notice and then some descriptions. READ THE DESCRIPTIONS BEFORE ASKING QUESTIONS!
4. Sometimes, if an item is highly desirable, there will be many posts in the thread where it is being offered. However, the crucial information is still available on the first page. So please, CHECK THE FIRST PAGE BEFORE ASKING "DETAILS PLEASE."!
You'd think the pointers above were common knowledge right? Think again!
Unnecessary patriotism
Ever heard of "over-patriotism?" Probably not, because I just came up with that rather grammatically incorrect phrase. Nonetheless, it describes a powerful phenomenon seen daily in our "beloved" land of "Everything's possible with a bit of moolah."
Let me elaborate...
Sometimes, well, most of the time:
1. Some foreigner will say "Oh, the toilets in your country are attrociously dirty!"
2. A Singaporean might say "Eh, I got conned in P.S. la! And the guys there are so rude!"
3. A Thai girl will say "You local men are bastards! You think ALL Thai women are whores!"
4. A foreigner will say "EWWW! How on Earth can you put something as foul as a durian in your mouth?! It smells like a used diaper in a clogged drain!"
5. Another local might say "Eh, damn slack la! So many 'Halal' western restaurants! Its so hard to find good pork chops and baby back ribs!"
Typical local response:
For examples 1 and 4:
"BLARDY FUCKING FOREIGNER! IF YOU DON'T LIKE OUR COUNTRY SO MUCH, GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM LA! FUCKING COLONIALIST BASTARD! YOU THINK YOU STILL OWN THIS COUNTRY IZZIT?! FUCK YOU!"
For example 2:
"FUCK YOU SINGAPOREAN BASTARD! DRINK TOILET WATER WANNA TALK SO MUCH! IF ITS NOT FOR OUR GENEROSITY GIVING YOU STUFF, YOU WILL BE NOTHING! KIASU FUCKER! GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY LA!"
And finally, for example 5:
"PUKIMAK LU LA CHEEBAI! THIS IS OUR COUNTRY! IF YOU'RE NOT HAPPY, GO BACK TO YOUR ANCESTORS' COUNTRY! BLARDY FUCKER!"
Now, factoring out all the common denominators in the typical responses, we get:
1. FUCK YOU.
2. GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY.
Now, why I say these people are being overly patriotic is, they bloody well KNOW what the 5 people said is damned true! Public toilets are so dirty in this country you barely find vermin in them! Don't believe me? Have you EVER seen a cockroach in one of those toilets?
P.S. is DAMN WELL full of conmen! The moment they see a white man or someone who dresses like a tourist, its a WHOLE different set of prices! I tried this out once. I told my foreigner friend to go ask the price of a particular watch in P.S. I told him just to ask the price, not to bargain and walk off. Later, I went to the SAME STALL and did the same. My price was RM80. The foreigner's price? RM150! If you ask them why they do this, they will say "Foreigner got lot of money mah! They can pay liao!"
However, what is worse, or should I say, the WORST is, when one local slags off another local. What do you mean when you say "Go back to your country!" ? THIS is my country! My parents were born and bred here! MY grandparents helped build this country too! So, WHO IN THE BLUE HELL ARE YOU to tell me I am not good enough to be a local here?!
It is always nice to receive praise from visitors. However, condemnation is also very, very important! Without criticism, how can one improve? Mind you, I speak of CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, the kind where the person criticizing has a justified reason in doing so. If a foreigner says local people are nice and friendly, then he is a "nice guy." But if he follows that praise up with the critique that these same nice people go absolutely arse-ways the moment they get into a vehicle, the foreigner suddenly becomes "a bastard who should 'go back to his own country'!"
A problem is like a wound. If you notice it and clean it and dress it, the wound will heal. If however, you choose to ignore it and say "It will heal by itself," the wound is going to get infected, get septic and finally, poison your whole body......
Let me elaborate...
Sometimes, well, most of the time:
1. Some foreigner will say "Oh, the toilets in your country are attrociously dirty!"
2. A Singaporean might say "Eh, I got conned in P.S. la! And the guys there are so rude!"
3. A Thai girl will say "You local men are bastards! You think ALL Thai women are whores!"
4. A foreigner will say "EWWW! How on Earth can you put something as foul as a durian in your mouth?! It smells like a used diaper in a clogged drain!"
5. Another local might say "Eh, damn slack la! So many 'Halal' western restaurants! Its so hard to find good pork chops and baby back ribs!"
Typical local response:
For examples 1 and 4:
"BLARDY FUCKING FOREIGNER! IF YOU DON'T LIKE OUR COUNTRY SO MUCH, GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM LA! FUCKING COLONIALIST BASTARD! YOU THINK YOU STILL OWN THIS COUNTRY IZZIT?! FUCK YOU!"
For example 2:
"FUCK YOU SINGAPOREAN BASTARD! DRINK TOILET WATER WANNA TALK SO MUCH! IF ITS NOT FOR OUR GENEROSITY GIVING YOU STUFF, YOU WILL BE NOTHING! KIASU FUCKER! GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY LA!"
And finally, for example 5:
"PUKIMAK LU LA CHEEBAI! THIS IS OUR COUNTRY! IF YOU'RE NOT HAPPY, GO BACK TO YOUR ANCESTORS' COUNTRY! BLARDY FUCKER!"
Now, factoring out all the common denominators in the typical responses, we get:
1. FUCK YOU.
2. GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY.
Now, why I say these people are being overly patriotic is, they bloody well KNOW what the 5 people said is damned true! Public toilets are so dirty in this country you barely find vermin in them! Don't believe me? Have you EVER seen a cockroach in one of those toilets?
P.S. is DAMN WELL full of conmen! The moment they see a white man or someone who dresses like a tourist, its a WHOLE different set of prices! I tried this out once. I told my foreigner friend to go ask the price of a particular watch in P.S. I told him just to ask the price, not to bargain and walk off. Later, I went to the SAME STALL and did the same. My price was RM80. The foreigner's price? RM150! If you ask them why they do this, they will say "Foreigner got lot of money mah! They can pay liao!"
However, what is worse, or should I say, the WORST is, when one local slags off another local. What do you mean when you say "Go back to your country!" ? THIS is my country! My parents were born and bred here! MY grandparents helped build this country too! So, WHO IN THE BLUE HELL ARE YOU to tell me I am not good enough to be a local here?!
It is always nice to receive praise from visitors. However, condemnation is also very, very important! Without criticism, how can one improve? Mind you, I speak of CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, the kind where the person criticizing has a justified reason in doing so. If a foreigner says local people are nice and friendly, then he is a "nice guy." But if he follows that praise up with the critique that these same nice people go absolutely arse-ways the moment they get into a vehicle, the foreigner suddenly becomes "a bastard who should 'go back to his own country'!"
A problem is like a wound. If you notice it and clean it and dress it, the wound will heal. If however, you choose to ignore it and say "It will heal by itself," the wound is going to get infected, get septic and finally, poison your whole body......
The Devil and His Kitchen
Anybody seen Hell's Kitchen? Good stuff... If you like watching people get a royal bollocking. Of course, I do completely agree with this form of "speech." If someone is good at what they do, you praise them... sparingly... But if someone is atrocious at their endeavours, what's more after being advised countless times, you DEFINITELY have to work them over!
Apparently, "The Devil" got into a tiff with a contestant, resulting in a lawsuit and and out of court settlement. Sad really... Because for those of you who watched the show (Season 1), you'd know who that cretin was. He was totally unprofessional, didn't know his arse from his elbow when it came to cooking, was ALWAYS whining about something or other and worst of all, had a sense of superiority about him.
Now, if a 3-Michelin star chef who's worth about 60 million quid tells you your food tastes like a cow's backside, it probably does! Don't argue!
Apparently now, the UK version of this show will be hosted by none other than Marco Pierre White. For those of you who claim to be gastronomes but have never heard of Chef Marco, I honestly do suggest you go back to eating out of a plastic package. He is quite possibly the greatest chef of his time. AND... He is among the few people in this world who made Gordon Ramsay cry! :)
I have already ordered his book "White Slave."
Apparently, "The Devil" got into a tiff with a contestant, resulting in a lawsuit and and out of court settlement. Sad really... Because for those of you who watched the show (Season 1), you'd know who that cretin was. He was totally unprofessional, didn't know his arse from his elbow when it came to cooking, was ALWAYS whining about something or other and worst of all, had a sense of superiority about him.
Now, if a 3-Michelin star chef who's worth about 60 million quid tells you your food tastes like a cow's backside, it probably does! Don't argue!
Apparently now, the UK version of this show will be hosted by none other than Marco Pierre White. For those of you who claim to be gastronomes but have never heard of Chef Marco, I honestly do suggest you go back to eating out of a plastic package. He is quite possibly the greatest chef of his time. AND... He is among the few people in this world who made Gordon Ramsay cry! :)
I have already ordered his book "White Slave."
Something funny in the mass media
I was browsing through a "compact" (Google it!) and came across this gem...
"Smoking is not bad! Yes, it causes cancer but so what? Its not a drug! Its not illegal!"
Right... So I guess all those countless hours of research and the millions... and millions... of dollars/ pounds/ euros/ etc of cash that went into all the R&D was to no avail, because the opinion of one idiot is the Gospel truth.
So, to all of you who have some form of a smoking related ailment, come off it! Stop whinging! Its pretty obvious smoking is "not bad," as so eloquently put across by this "intelligent" person.
"Smoking is not bad! Yes, it causes cancer but so what? Its not a drug! Its not illegal!"
Right... So I guess all those countless hours of research and the millions... and millions... of dollars/ pounds/ euros/ etc of cash that went into all the R&D was to no avail, because the opinion of one idiot is the Gospel truth.
So, to all of you who have some form of a smoking related ailment, come off it! Stop whinging! Its pretty obvious smoking is "not bad," as so eloquently put across by this "intelligent" person.
What does that title mean?
Hello to you, the person reading this... Narcissim and hedonism are quite similar in that they both describe an obnoxious prick, like myself, who thinks he is always right and is absolutely in love with himself, once again accurate to my being.
Before you proceed to read, I suggest you read these rules first:
1. If you cannot fathom my posts, I suggest you either get some tutoring in English or go elsewhere, because this blog will be filled with proper English. I shall avoid using stupid, brainless, retarded 'baby talk' like the following: Kewl, Muacks!, C'ya, Sumthin and so on and so forth...
2. There will definitely by profanity here, although I will try not to go too overboard. I believe my command of the Queen's English is strong enough for me to refrain from using too much unparliamentary language.
3. I will state my opinion here and to me, being a narcissistic person, only my opinion matters! Nonetheless, you are more than welcome to leave your comments.
That is all for now...
Before you proceed to read, I suggest you read these rules first:
1. If you cannot fathom my posts, I suggest you either get some tutoring in English or go elsewhere, because this blog will be filled with proper English. I shall avoid using stupid, brainless, retarded 'baby talk' like the following: Kewl, Muacks!, C'ya, Sumthin and so on and so forth...
2. There will definitely by profanity here, although I will try not to go too overboard. I believe my command of the Queen's English is strong enough for me to refrain from using too much unparliamentary language.
3. I will state my opinion here and to me, being a narcissistic person, only my opinion matters! Nonetheless, you are more than welcome to leave your comments.
That is all for now...
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